!WARNING!

Not all poetry is alike!
There is GOOD Poetry – There is BAD Poetry
Approach all Poets-at-Work with care
Be on the lookout for any evidence of BAD Poetry – BAD Poetry can cause permanent brain damage

The Poet on GOOD Poetry (Figure 1a), was able to write the following wholesome, beautiful ode. In the Brain on GOOD Poetry photo (Figure 1b), notice the condition of the brain. Uniform size on each side. The lovely, calming, pastel hues of this brain’s gray matter, are echoed in the lilting beauty of the following poem, entitled

January Ode“:

On a bright white day one January
I called out, “Darling! Can you carry
My packages across the ice for me?
Such courtesy would be nice to see!”
 
 “Of course, my Sweet!” he said and smiled,
So lovingly, I was beguiled.
And with joy imbued, I shed a tear
Of gratitude for my Darling Dear.

Not even the harshest poetry critic alive would ever be able to call such a gem as that “January Ode” anything less than perfection! The next so-called “poem” was, incredibly, penned by the same poet. Notice the subtle differences between the two styles. (The differences are easier to spot in Figures 2a and 2b. As the reader becomes more practiced in detecting the difference between GOOD and BAD Poetry, the radical (though hidden to the untrained eye) departure the poet takes in the following example of BAD Poetry will become easier to spot. Once again, I urge all poetry readers to be ever vigilant in the mission to eradicate all BAD Poetry. Read as much of it as you can.* Educate yourself on the insidious ways of BAD Poetry, and be prepared to teach what you have learned. Only then, by sharing all we know of BAD Poetry, will we rid ourselves of this deadly scourge.

  “January Morning Ode”

One January morning, at break of
Wind Day
You cut the cheese to the chase:
“tis a fart far better thing I do,”
Says you. “P. U.,” says I, and
“My, oh my!”

I begged you,
As you left for gas class,
Rip! “Ric! Please don’t go
to José’s for lunch!
You know what that ‘buy one, get toot two’
menu
does to
you.”

“But, Darling, if I only let get one,
I’ll be hungry all day,”
you said, without stinking blinking an eye.
And as you turned to leave,
You reminded me
you would be late for dinner.
“I must have my trouser cough cuffs
hemmed at the tailor’s shop.”

“Poot “Poor tailor,” I sighed.
“Don’t worry,” you replied,
“He’s a good tailor.
It will all come out well
in
the
end.”

 

Figure 1a

 

 

Figure 1b

Figure 2a

 

 

Figure 2b

 

* An excellent place to start your education is at the following website: Excellence in Bad  This website is being continually updated with the latest in BAD Poetry. Educated spotters of BAD Poetry are encouraged to submit whatever examples they cab find, for the edification of all.

(I have had more trouble getting this post up than you could possibly believe.  Therefore, I bid you all a good night.  I have had enough. . .)

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