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"Wall of Spam" by Chotka via Flickr (Creative Commons License)

“Hello i endowed with forge a unrivalled allocate with ANONYMUS PROXYS all the proxys are google coffer and calmness the ip and this is not all they updated every 24 hours so if you searching as a replacement in search ANONYMUS ARCHETYPAL SERVER then you well-mannered on this air it is the most taking roots after Fresh Substitute Server”

Got the above spam this morning.  Apparently I need to quit writing and get some substitute or proxy bloggers.  (I know it says Servers, but hey! – I thought I was a pretty good servant.)  But that forge – that scares me a little (well, actually, it scares me a lot).  What do they mean?  Will they smelt me and forge me?  I dunno.  Sounds a little too hot for me (but not in the x-rated sense.)

It struck me as odd, because so many of my other spammers have raved about my blog – about the interesting points that I make and my well-crafted writing and stimulating topics – which are eagerly read by everyone in their families and all their co-workers.  Their co-workers simply cannot do a thing at the office until they’ve read my thoughts and astute advice.  There is one post in particular that received such a glowing accolade.  Read the first three (brief) paragraphs of this one:

https://paulatohlinecalhoun1951.wordpress.com/2011/08/12/bwa-ha-ha-ha-haaaaaaaaa/

If you decided not to take the time to go see what that posts is about, it is one in which it seems to me that they are the ones in need of help. However, my loyal spammers do comment on other posts and tell me they read RFACM every day!  (They just don’t comment as often on those others.  Hmmm. . .)  So I feel inclined to believe them when they say I’m the one who needs the help.

So, anybody want to guest-blog, or be a proxy server/servant for me?  I feel obligated to appease my spammers! As the spam states, you are welcome to be ANONYMOUS if you so desire.  (Just beware – if it’s a really good post, I’ll take credit.  Otherwise, it’s all yours!)

I guess my loyal spammers will (or already) think I’ve said enough. . .

(wc 358)
(TIOOMWSAHFP)

P.S.  This Spam just came in as a comment on my “Mars and Venus” post.  I can’t imagine what they are talking about, but I certainly would like to see them try:

“Can you imagine there’s someone on fiverr.com willing to do this for $5?”

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