I have a very interesting collection of fab facts for you today! I hope you will find them interesting too, and fun and edifying. One can never have too many facts in one’s head. One, however, can have. . .*
1. The “naked recreation and travel” industry has grown by 233% in the past decade. I can understand naked recreation. I mean, who doesn’t want to watch nude people playing volleyball? (Notice that I said watch!) I do hope that a medic is nearby during those matches, though. Imagine the bruising that could happen. Or the eyes that can be put out. However, naked travel really puzzles me. You couldn’t use public transportation, I assume (I might be wrong); travel by jet, train, or bus would require a charter. Very expensive, unless you have a lot of naked friends just itching (no joke!) to travel and the cost could be split among you (perhaps at the crack – easier that way). But I just cannot see getting to your naked destination driving your car. Imagine if your car seats were vinyl!
2. Sugar Bear, the mascot for (Post’s) “Golden Crisp” cereal, was born in 1963. What do you know? I see a sop box, and it is right here by me. Think I’ll step on it a expound for a few sentences.
“Golden Crisp” was not the original name of this cereal. It has gone through several changes since its first appearance in 1949. Notice that it is the name that has undergone changes. The recipe has not. Back in the olden days, when I was a child, my brother Dick and I had a favorite cereal called – get this – “Super Sugar Honey Crisp!” The slogan for this cereal could have been “Made for kids, designed by dentists!” Or perhaps, “Type II Diabetes in a box!” The sugar in this cereal accounts for more the 50% of its volume by weight. No wonder it tastes great to kids. As the years went by, the name morphed to keep up with the latest trends in nutritional circles ( obviously because if you change the name of something, it then changes the content!). From its original name, it became “Sugar Crisp,” then “Honey Crisp,” then to its current incarnation of “Golden Crisp.” Kellogg’s has its own incarnation of the sweetened puffed wheat cereal known as “Honey Smacks,” (formerly “Sugar Smacks). All made with the same general recipe, which I would say is (not including additives to “retain freshness!”) sugar, honey, (without the added honey, it wouldn’t be sweet enough). puffed wheat. Despite all the negative publicity given to these types of products marketed to kids, these cereals remain top sellers for their respective corporations. After all, “When eaten in moderate amounts along with protein, complex carb, and fiber components, this deadly cereal can be part of a nutritious, healthy breakfast.” Uh Huh.
3. In 1631, two London Bible printers accidentally left the word “not” out of the seventh commandment, which then read, “Thou shalt commit adultery.” This legendary Bible has been known for centuries as “The Wicked Bible.” That Bible must be still in circulation, as it has become very popular to obey the seventh. I still wonder if those two printers were in collusion. They wanted to “legalize their wife-swapping scheme” – what better way?
That reminds me of one of my favorite jokes:
The first time Moses came down from the mountain after communing with God, he brought with him three tablets, inscribed with fifteen commandments. The Israelites were quite upset about this stringent set of rules, and demanded that Moses go back up the mountain and negotiate with God. Reluctantly, Moses agreed. The second time Moses descends, he stands before his people, who are waiting expectantly for the results of the Holy negotiation. Moses said, “I have some good news and some bad news. The good news is that I’ve got Him down to ten. The bad news is that number seven stays.”
4. Emus cannot walk backwards. I wonder if we can create a syllogism from that phrase? Emus cannot walk backwards. Drunks cannot walk backwards. Therefore all drunks are emus.
5. Chinese Crested dogs can get acne. I sense another syllogism coming on: Chinese Crested dogs can get acne. Teenagers can get acne. Therefore all teenagers are Chinese Crested dogs. (Now that one makes sense. . .)
*enough. . .