My Gentle Readers, I came upon a distressing piece of news today. Take a deep breath and prepare yourself:
There is no form of fortune-telling or divination that begins with the letter “Q.” Dear me! Whatever shall I do? Oh, I know! I will make one up. Wait for it. . .
No, really, I mean wait for it!
Over on my second favorite site on the ‘net, (For my favorite, see the NB at the end of this post.), Phrontistery, after some extensive checking, I found that not only is there no “Q-mancy,” there are also no “mancies” for the letters “J,” “W,” “V,” or “Y.” This is a disaster of the first magnitude. I shall therefore attempt to come up with words to fill in the gap, and thereby avoid further damage to my native country, “Vocabulandia.” Your generous, tax-deductible donations will go to the restoration and reconstruction currently going on in the cities most affected by this tragedy – namely, Jtown, Qfarington, Wville, Vton, and Ying City.
This week, we will concentrate on the most devastated area of Vocabulandia – Qfarington – which is the county seat of Qvince. The County Courthouse was utterly destroyed, and it is also the home of the County Administrator, the famed fortune-teller, Mme. Quorialis. The most evident and tragic bit of destruction was that of the county’s Qmancy. Qmancy is the abbreviated form of the mancy correctly called “Querimonymancy.” For the uninformed among you, “Querimonymancy” is the use of a large portion of complaints to divine the future of a chronic whiner. As you can probably guess, the future of such persons is seldom a pretty sight, which of course gives the whiner plenty of material for future complaints. The tragedy of losing Querimonymancy is that whiners now have nothing about which to complain.
Please be generous. There are whiners who are depending on you. Donated complaints can be sent to Qfarington in care of RFACM, by depositing them in the Comments section. Remember, your donations are tax-deductible. So make every effort to complain – as long and annoyingly as possible.
I don’t know about you, but I have had enough. . .
(N.B. My favorite site on the net is yours! You are welcome to post this fact on your blog. Using your widgets page, type in as plain text the following: “‘____________’ (insert your blog’s name in the blank space) is Paula Tohline Calhoun’s favorite blog! Ms. Tohline Calhoun is the popular author of the internationally famous blog, “Reflections From a Cloudy Mirror.” )
The more prominent you make your widget, the more advantageous to your site!